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Diary December 24, 2011

December 24, 2011

I’m never really sure what I’m going to write when before I start, so sometimes I just let it go where it may.  Today I woke up thinking about something and how I don’t like where it is until a friend reminded me to just let it unfold.  I was also reminded by another friend to forget what is gone, appreciate what remans, and to look forward to what’s ahead.  Great stuff.  It’s about being in the moment really and sometimes its difficult when the moment isn’t a good one or sometimes those moments stretch into months and months.  I find that I demand constant change to remain interested and motivated.

As I get older I find myself desparate to for that change.  I see years go by, the face looking older, the body not as capable as it was when I was younger, and look back and wonder where time went?  I also look back on those years and see the long stretches  where nothing moved forward.  The other day I thought my age was a hinderance in a youth oriented society, but then I thought again…fuck that, I’ll get and be where I’m supposed to be when the time comes.  I can still hang with the big dogs and teach a few new tricks.

Today, I’ll enjoy the moment, revel in my nubile young body, appreciate what I do have and look forward to an exciting future filled with welcome challenges, and new people who are just as exciting.  Today, I love myself and everything about me, including my bratty side.  Amen!

 

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